Tuesday, January 23, 2007

The Adventures of Late Night Supermarket Man and BogoGirl - Part 1

We meet our, um, heroes, as they embark on a late night mission to Super Fresh, which is the name of a supermarket, ironically suited for a pair of would-be superheroes.

Bogo: You see, it's because the name is Super Fresh, and we're super
heroes. And we're in a super market.

LNSM: I think they get it.

Bogo: But everything is Super!

We get it. That's Bogogirl, Late Night Supermarket Man's trusty and obligatory sidekick.

LNSM: She's a pain in the ass, really.

Bogo: Look, Late Night
Supermarket man, Crinkle cut fries! Store brand crinkle cut fries! Two for one!

LNSM: Don't those take too long to make?

Bogo: No, you just
preheat to 450, spread them out on a tray, put em in the oven, and 20 minutes
later you've got crispy, delicious--

LNSM: Stop reading the
package.

Bogogirl loved to read the packages. Late night Supermarket Man never reads the packages.

LNSM: A real hero doesn't need instructions. Put them back, Bogo. This mission
calls for--wait, what is our mission?

What our heroes don't know is that there is no mission today. Only exposition.

Bogogirl: I don't know. I'm just a silly awkward girl with glasses, who
can't resist a bargain.

LNSM: Subtle.

Bogogirl: And I have a middle child complex.

LNSM: I'm from New Jersey.

Bogogirl: That about says it all, doesn't it?

LNSM: It serves as a basic explanation. There's more to come.

Bogogirl: So can we get the crinkle cut fries. Store brand two for
one?

LNSM: You're going to buy them no matter what, aren't you?

Bogogirl: I'm not a very good sidekick in that way. Two for one! Come on!

Just then, the noble narrator began to wonder if anyone out there would find these adventures to be anything more than a colossal waste of time.

LNSM: Get the damn french fries. Do we have enough ketchup back at
the hideout?

Bogogirl: I...Don't...Know...

Dun Dun Dun!

Will Bogogirl get the Crinkle cut fries? Will there be enough ketchup at home? Will anyone want to find out? Find out next time on...

"Heinz 57 Anxieties" OR "Fry Me to the Moon"

1 comment:

Nicole said...

I vote Fry Me to the Moon. Especially if it involves future parodies of my favorite song.