Friday, March 30, 2007

Story of the Week - March 26-30 DO NOT READ THIS POST! DON'T DO IT!


I saw a great ad on the Internet this week. It was a picture of Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad on a black background. Below, the words "DO NOT CLICK ON THIS AD - IGNORE THIS MAN" flashed enticingly.

Whether you try to ignore the ad or immediately recognize the point it's probably trying to make, you WILL click on it (just like you're reading this post in spite of the title) And I did, and it brought me to a page about the dangerous implications of giving this man a global stage.

Ahmadinejad has taken steps recently to take over the global stage yet again. He has been granted a Visa by the US State Department to come speak before the UN General Assembly. There, he will make his case against Security Council sanctions that will probably be passed and imposed on his country the moment he finishes speaking. Unless of course he halts Iran's uranium enrichment program. (Not. Likely.) Even Russia, long Iran's best customer and regional best friend, has started to pressure Iran to stop its nuclear activities, said it would vote for the UN sanctions and threatened to stop construction of nuclear facilities inside Iran.

Then there's this stand-off between Iran and Great Britain. Britons are being held under the claim that they sailed into Iranian waters. The British not only deny this, but they have photographic proof that the ship was well inside Iraqi waters. But it seems they can say anything they want. Iran took them captive to make a statement, and the propaganda coming from Tehran this week has been eerie and fascinating.

“To British People,” the latest letter, supposedly from one of the captives, said: “I am writing to you as a British service person who has been sent to Iraq, sacrificed due to the intervening policies of the Bush and Blair governments.”
“Whereas we hear and see on the news the way that prisoners were treated in Abu Ghraib and other Iraqi jails by the British and American personnel, I have received total respect and faced no harm,” the letter in her name said. “It is now our time to ask our government to make a change to its oppressive behavior towards other people.”

There is simply no way that a British sailor wrote this letter on her own. Just like there is no way that the British sailors were taken captive because of something they did wrong. Yet Tony Blair apologizes and continues to request the safe return of the Brits.

Blair is also hoping that the US stays out of the dispute. Why? Because that is exactly the opposite of what Ahmadinejad wants. He wants the US to "click on the ad," so he can declare the US as supporting aggressive imperialist oppression in the region and give him cause to continue developing nuclear weapons, maybe invade Iraq or destroy Israel or whatever else he has on his agenda.

One way to stop him is to ignore him. He has less control over his own people than he lets on, and probably had less to do with the British ship seizure than we think. But he is a master propagandist and a brilliant brinksman. And he is begging Dubya and company to overreact. And I pray that someone is telling Bush to keep his mouth shut and his hands tied. No matter how tempting it may be, we cannot click on that ad.

Monday, March 26, 2007

The Cost of Winning

Note: This story has nothing to do with NCAA brackets, because Texas sucks. And so does Texas A&M. And Kansas. And Wisconsin. Clearly, I won't be winning any NCAA pools.

But I did win a portable DVD player.

About 2 weeks ago, a woman came around the newsroom at CNN with a box of munchkins, repeating a conversation that went something like this:

--want a munchkin?

--sure. what are they for.

--for the Continuous Learning Environment.

--ok, whatever thanks.

--we have a new and improved website and we're giving away a DVD player. here's a card.

And...scene. See most people just stop at "thanks for the munchkin." But I know from years of Hillel tabling that when people bring you food and you don't know who they are, they are probably trying to tell you who they are, and why they are giving you free food. So I ate the munchkin AND looked at the card, which directed me to the Continuous Learning Environment (CLE - and yes, they pronounce it "CLEE") website where I clicked on the "Win a DVD player" link.

Now here's where many might have given up, if they'd gotten this far. Because, in order to win the DVD player, you had to answer 3 questions about CLE, which meant potentially spending a long time exploring the website.

But with the chance at the player in sight, I ventured into the CLE seeking answers to the 3 questions.

1. Which Training Tip do you think is the most helpful?
This answer I found in a link marked "training tips" and i just picked out one that sounded good and was somewhere in the middle of the list. This is a technique I picked up sometime between 1oth grade and my freshman year of college. Basically, when you have to read a book for class but you can't read more than 3 paragraphs before your head starts to sag and you wake up 15 minutes later with drool on your chin, you just take a few choice quotes from the middle of the book for use on tests, in-class participation, and term papers. Works every time.

2. Fill in the blank in this sentence from the CLE Mission statement: "At the Continuous Learning Environment (CLE), we believe learning is a process, not a ______
This involved some digging, but of course the mission statement was on the front page, so it really just involved a bit of reading. By the way, the answer is "event." Learning is a process, not an event. OK.

3. Find the Channel for Learning. From the list of videos available, tell us which one is your favorite.
This question had the courtesy not to ask me why whatever video I chose was my favorite. So I just chose a random video.

And in about 5 minutes on the CLE website, I had my 3 answers and sent them off.

2 weeks later, the donut lady comes by our area looking for me. And she tells me I won. And the general reaction among my coworkers was "wow. you might have been the only person who entered." Regardless, on Friday, donut lady plus 2 more of the CLE people brought me my prize. And it was then that I discovered nothing is completely free.

"Can we take your picture?" they asked. "It's for the website." Wasn't expecting that. Then they asked if they could film me opening the box. Weird. Finally they said "we also want to do a quick interview." See when I entered to win this thing, I didn't think there'd be press involved. But alright, go ahead. Interview.

So he comes back with a tripod and a microphone and wires me up and gets ready to interview me, while I have no idea what he could possibly ask me. "how does it feel to win a DVD player?" or "what are you going to do with your new DVD player?"

Instead he asks, "What do you think of the CLE website?" you want me to bullshit.

"Would you recommend the CLE website to your co-workers? What would you tell them?"

Sure, I'd recommend it. I'd tell them the CLE website is very helpful. After all, it won me this DVD player. No, I didn't say that, but I should have. Actually, I can't remember what I said, but if I wanted to, I could write up a transcript, and I might do that if I overcome the urge to destroy the DVD copy of the interview they gave me (which I can watch in my new DVD convenient!). But don't count on it.

The good thing is, I have my DVD player, the interview is only available on an internal CNN website, and nothing I said is funny, interesting, or embarrassing enough to end up on YouTube.

In Other News: My friend and loyal "Full Circle" reader Samantha Ross appeared on Jeopardy! Wednesday night and demonstrated The Importance of Being Right in Final Jeopardy. You can catch her again Thursday night.

Friday, March 23, 2007

Story of the Week - March 19-23

Tremendous Harm

The Bush administration is so corrupt that the Democratic majority in Congress doesn't know where to start. By the time they unravel all of the corruption and prove it legally, Bush will be out of office, thankfully. But perhaps he should be out of office sooner than that.

If anything, Attorney General Alberto Gonzales should have resigned last week, yesterday, an hour ago, whenever, but the fact that he still has a job today is just another example of the utter disregard that the Bush White House has for the people, laws, and Constitution of this country.

I'm trying to wrap my head around all of this. But here is what happened and what is happening. The Attorney General, with encouragement from the White House, fired 8 US attorneys who were seen as disloyal to the Bush Administration. U.S. Attorneys are political appointees, as is the Attorney General, and all can be fired by the President. However, the US Attorneys are also part of the Judicial Branch of government. So while the President has the power to choose US attorneys, he cannot tell them how to prosecute their cases. And if a US attorney thinks he's going to be fired unless he prosecutes according to the President's agenda, we might as well not have separation of powers in the Constitution.

Speaking of separation of powers, the Legislative Branch wishes to exercise its check on the Executive by asking key administration officials to testify before Congress. If, as the Bushies say, you did nothing wrong and you stand by the Attorney General, why not share with Congress? We don't have to, says the Bush Administration. Ok, you can talk to Karl Rove, but in a closed-door meeting with no transcript. And you can't place him under oath.

In other words: Here you go democrats, Karl's gonna sit in that chair and lie to you until you're satisfied.

And THEN the administration has the chutzpah to be appalled when the Democrats reject this preposterous offer (which the White House called "extremely generous" - seriously) and seek subpoenas. And it's almost guaranteed that the White House will use all means necessary, legal and illegal, to make sure that Karl Rove doesn't face the Senate Judiciary Committee under oath.

Any more of this, and Congress might be forced to draw up articles of impeachment. That's what Mayor Rocky Anderson, of Salt Lake City, wants. Here, read this:

The Mayor of Salt Lake City, a democrat who was brought up Mormon, a multiple-term mayor of a very conservative city, is calling for Bush's impeachment on a daily basis. And he's 100% right.

"our love for our nation - our regard for our constitution - brings us here today to call for the impeachment of a President who has done and continues to do such tremendous harm to our country."

The Washington Post knows more about this than I do:

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

FOOFARAW - Major Foofaraw

I don't know why I was thinking about this today. But you know, sometimes you're staring off into space or not paying attention to anything in particular and a word pops into your head for know apparent reason and you're mind is just off to the races? Maybe it's just me.

I wasn't staring off into space, really, I mean, the TV is on, I'm talking to someone online, but my head was someplace else and in pops the word:

Potato Pancakes.

I don't know. It's not Chanukah or anything, it's not like Chanukah's soon, and it's not like it just happened, but there it was. And I thought about the time Freshman year, it was finals time, and my friends and I, away from home for Chanukah for the first time I guess, decided we needed potato pancakes. Not just needed them, needed to make them. Only we didn't have a car, a kitchen, utensils, or anything really. Except a microwave, and a fridge. You can't make potato pancakes in a microwave.

But we were determined. Somehow we got someone to take us to a grocery store for oil and potatoes and onions and whatever else. We borrowed a pan from the Resident Director. A nice pan, too, good size, heavy, perfect. We got plastic utensils, probably nicked a few things from the dining hall downstairs. Painstakingly, we peeled and grated potatoes (no idea where the grater came from) and onions and mixed it all together using some one's mom's recipe. And it's 2 hours later than we thought and we're getting hungry and by God this is taking a long time.

The batter was ready, time to cook. And still no stove. The dining hall? nope. The RD? Nope. She lent us the pan, but using her kitchen wasn't going to happen. And then we discover, there's a stove in a room in the basement. But the room is locked. We ask our RA. He calls Public Safety to come open the door for the little freshmen, and suddenly, he wants the potato pancakes as badly as we do. He'll even cook them for us, just to be safe, or something. It's like 8:30 now and we started around 6, and Public Safety arrives and opens the door. The room is crowded with extra, mostly broken, dorm furniture. Chairs and sofas piled up. And a stove in the corner, plugged in. Fire it up!

We do, and the oil is sizzling in the pan and we plop down a bit of batter and wait for it to fry. At long last, a potato pancake. The little lump of potato starts to sizzle, and smoke. And smoke. In fact, there's a lot of smoke and it's filling the windowless room. And I look up and see a smoke detector, right above the stove. And I say "hey, we might want to turn this off before we set off the--"

Too late. It's beeping like crazy and in minutes, the building is evacuated. Hundreds of students, studying for finals, pushed outside at night, in Syracuse, in December. And all because the little group of Jews had to have their potato pancake. And then the firemen come, charging into the dorm, into the basement, to the little room with the stove, and the little lump of potato smoking on the stove.

I don't know what made me think of it, but it's a good story. And because I have this blog, it got written, instead of swirling in my head and eventually retreating to the depths of memory and waiting for a more appropriate time to surface.

Monday, March 19, 2007

Happy Anniversary, Moron. Happy Now?

Today is the 4th Anniversary of the beginning of the War in Iraq.

In 2003, when we started, 72% of Americans supported the war (turns out, we were lied to, big time) Now, 32% favor it, not that I've actually met any of those people.

3,220 Americans have been killed in Iraq since the war began. That's more than were killed in the September 11 attacks. Over 24,000 Americans have been wounded.

Somewhere between 60,000 and 65,000 Iraqis have been killed, many by other Iraqis. Over 2 million Iraqis have fled Iraq for such places as Sweden and Egypt.

And nobody seems to know exactly what to do next, or how it all will end. And our commander in chief is a complete and utter moron.

Is there good news? Well, 673 days until he leaves the worst foreign policy disaster in the history of The United States behind for somebody else to clean up.

Happy Freakin' Anniversary.

Friday, March 16, 2007

Story of the Week - March 12-16

The Field of 65 and The Top 12

I'll make my peace. Syracuse deserved to get into the NCAA Tournament this year. This fact was proven, in my mind, when Stanford, 18-12 in the regular season, got CRUSHED by Louisville, losing by 20 points and being down by 30 multiple times in the game. Way to take advantage of that tournament spot.

I may be the only one, but I really hope SU wins the NIT.

Why is Sanjaya still on American Idol? How did he get into the top 24, let alone the top 12 and now the top 11?

Everybody seems to think Winthrop is going to beat Notre Dame. Did you hear what Simon said to Sanjaya? "You're very brave." I mean, he wouldn't even comment on the singing, that's how bad he was!

And so go the conversations of March. Two sports dominate the phone lines, the text messages, and the email exchanges - college basketball and American Idol.

That's right. American Idol is a sport.

American Idol is not just a reality show. A reality show is something you watch when you've temporarily lost the ability to think and can do nothing but slump on a couch with a little drool dripping down your chin. Reality shows have developed into a genre of cheaply-produced modern day gladiatorial voyeurism. They go something like this - we take 12 chefs/fashion designers/comedians and make them do tasks related to their field (with lots of commercial tie-ins) crown the winner with some cutesy name (most likely a play on words regarding cooking/fashion/comedy) and make them live in a house together so they swear at each other, get in each others' way and eventually gnaw each others' faces off.

Which isn't to say that wasn't Idol's intention five years ago when it started. But now, Idol is not a reality show - it's an event. It's a sport. A weekly, live competition with a live audience and watched on TV by millions, then discussed and analyzed in offices, on radio talk shows, written up in magazines and newspapers, and culminating with a major championship. You can't say this for Top Chef. You can say it even less for The Surreal Life (is that still on? I don't watch much reality TV)

I started watching American Idol in its second season (season one was over the summer and I was away) with my roommates - my sports-crazed roommates who then were involved in sports-related academic and extracurricular activities and now are involved in sports professions - and we were all hooked. Hooked on Reuben. Then hooked on Carrie. After college, I watched with my mom. Still do. And then I talk it over with my old roommates. Right after we talk about Spring Training, or recently, our NCAA Brackets. And I'm sure that, in April and especially in May, American Idol will occupy our conversations the way the World Series does in October. American Idol is a sport.

The first weekend of the NCAA Tournament yielded few upsets, nothing nearly as upsetting as the ousting of Brandon and the keeping of Sanjaya. Sanjaya is a true Cinderella story, I mean just look at him. He may actually take the stage in glass slippers if Idol voters allow him to stay. Hopefully this is the last week we'll have to see him, because he doesn't belong in the top 10. #11 seeds Winthrop and VCU lost on Saturday. Let's hope Sanjaya becomes #11 in the Idol ranks on Wednesday. And then the Sweet Sixteen will start.

I love March. Now if only we could do something about the weather.

Monday, March 12, 2007

Me-decade mischief OR Trivia Killed the Radio Star

When we last left our heroes...

BOGO: That was like 3 weeks ago!

JB: We've been
playing this game for three weeks.

BOGO: And Late Night Supermarket man

He hasn't disappeared. He's upstairs.

JB: I told him not to go upstairs.

Anyway, when we last left our heroes...

BOGO: The author forgot about us.

He didn't forget about you, he probably had other things to do.

BOGO: Like what? He left us here for 3 weeks!

How much Totally 80s can one play? And I still don't have my software.

We're getting to that. Anyway, when we last left our heroes...

BOGO: Three weeks ago, while the author ignored us...

Hey, don't knock the author.

BOGO: Why not? Author dumpster barbecue Spaniard

JB: What?

I told you.

BOGO: doodle intestified fidgety pottsdam circulation

JB: What's going on?

She knocked the author.

JB: Well maybe he deserves it.

Careful now.

JB: Right

Anyway, when we last left our heroes...

JB: Can I catch them up, if that's ok with the author.

Apparently it is.

JB: All right, what's his name--

BOGO: Late
Night Supermarket Man

JB: Right. He's upstairs and he got lost or
something, and we've been playing Trivial Pursuit, and She's winning.

BOGO: I always win.

JB: And if she wins she gets to keep the
software, and if I win, I get the software. And the game has been taking a long

BOGO: And I'm winning.

JB: I can't believe you're still

BOGO: Why not?

JB: You pissed off the author.

BOGO: Only temporarily. You threatened to sue him for libel.

How did you know that?

BOGO: Know what?

JB: Stop it.

BOGO: Can't help it. He speaks through me if he wants. I don't know
where this is coming from.

JB: This is too weird for me. Any chance you
could wrap this up and get me out of it?

BOGO: You might not like the outcome.

JB: Why not?

BOGO: Well, we're the heroes. And we can't find the
software, so there has to be some other way we get out of this. And I don't
think it involves you getting your software.

And on that, BOGOGirl was right. JB's request to wrap it up quick resulted in the following developments. BOGOGirl collected her final piece of the pie with an answer of "Perestroika" and defeated JB (who is probably going to sue for libel). Then BOGOGirl shouted:

BOGO: You lose! I win the software!

Which Late Night Supermarket Man heard, and came bounding down the stairs.

LNSM: There is no software! And you were right, don't
go up to the second floor.

JB pounded his fist on the ground

BOGO: Told you you weren't gonna like it.

As our heroes, somehow mildly successful, hightailed it back to the North Carolina airport for a flight home. The End.

Stay tuned to The Full Circle for the next somewhat entertaining adventure of Late Night Supermarket Man and BOGOGirl!

Friday, March 9, 2007

Story of the Week - March 5-9

First of all, how do you get Ann Coulter to shut her mouth? Stop listening to her. And by God, don't buy her books.

Now, Story of the week.


Scooter Libby is a liar. That thing about Tim Russert telling him about covert CIA agent Valerie Plame? He made it up. And now he's going to jail for it. Maybe.

Oversimplified and quite possibly peppered with inaccuracy, here is the Scooter Libby story, and why, in the wake of this week's verdict, the call is out for Vice President Dick Cheney to resign:

In 2002, Joe Wilson, a former ambassador to African nations and Iraq, went to Niger, possibly on instructions from Cheney, to discover whether Iraq was trying to buy uranium from Niger and thus fuel their weapons of mass destruction. Wilson came home and said he doubted this was true.

That didn't stop the Bush administration from claiming in the 2003 State of the Union that "The British government has learned that Saddam Hussein recently sought significant quantities of uranium from Africa." A number of articles including Joe Wilson's "What I didn't find in Africa" refute this in later months. In later months, the War in Iraq also begins, justified partly by the "evidence" from Africa.

More importantly in this case, Joe Wilson wrote that scathing article, which was true, critical of the Bush administration. Within the month, Wilson's wife, Valerie Plame, is outed as a CIA operative, in what Wilson alleges was the Bush administration's revenge on his criticisms. The act itself, he says, was orchestrated by Cheney (this is an ongoing lawsuit)

So someone outed this covert agent, and that's against the law. Judith Miller of the New York Times is asked to reveal her source and refuses, until Libby relieves her of her obligation to protect her sources and Miller essentially says it was Libby. And Libby says it wasn't. And he was lying.

Beyond that, if Cheney or Rove told Libby to out Plame, we don't know for sure, but a lot of people, including Joe Wilson, think so. Whether Libby lied to protect Cheney we also don't know, but it's possible. Regardless, Libby lied and he's going to jail for it.

The fascinating part of the story is what will happen to Cheney. Calls for his resignation have gone out from all sides, Republican and Democrat. It would help Bush, it would help Republican presidential candidates, it would give the democrats a say in who the next VP is, it would make the country better to have anyone but Cheney.

Sadly, these are mostly "what-if" scenarios. Cheney is way too arrogant to admit wrongdoing and defeat, especially since he wasn't convicted. Remember, when he shot his friend in the face (by accident), the friend apologized to Cheney! He's the same guy who, when the Bush campaign asked him to go find a Vice President he came back a few days later and said "I'll do it." He found himself. Now that's arrogance.

There is no doubt that Dick Cheney is arrogant, corrupt, vindictive, criminal, soulless, evil, and stubborn. There is also little doubt that he orchestrated the leak of Valerie Plame's identity with the intention of sabotaging her career to exact revenge on Joe Wilson. Each day, the guy reminds me more and more of Jafar from "Aladdin."

Which leads me to believe that even if Bush asked him to resign, he would say no, and it would take criminal conviction (not likely, says Libby Prosecutor Pat Fitzgerald) congressional impeachment (less likely) or a fatal burst blood clot in his leg (possible?) to remove him from office otherwise.

But just the thought or resignation and the prominent people voicing that thought is enough to make you think about how much this Vice President doesn't give a crap about anything but his own personal power and agenda. And sadly, there's not much we can do about it, and Cheney knows it.

There is good news, though: Cheney has no desire to run for President. So in 683 days, he'll be gone anyway.

Please, discuss. This is a monster story and we all can help each other understand it.

Thursday, March 8, 2007

Israel Posts PUBLISHED!

I found a website, The Traveler's Pen, looking for contributors. All I had to do was register and get approval and I could start posting. And so I did.

After I sent about 4 of the Israel posts that I wrote for this blog, the editor of The Traveler's Pen emailed me:

"We decided to give you your very own section for your series. They are a lot of fun to read and want to encourage our readers to read them."

And so if you go to you will find a link on the side for "Birthright Israel" and that's me.

So click on them, read them again even if you've read them already, and tell everyone you know! And thank you all for continuing to read my blog and for encouraging me to write those Israel posts in the first place!

Saturday, March 3, 2007

Story of the Week - Feb 26- March 2

Have You Found Jesus Yet?

The man who brought you Titanic is now at the helm of a documentary called The Lost Tomb of Jesus. Cameron, along with director Simcha Jacobovici, has gathered suspect evidence from an archaeological site in Jerusalem and sculpted it to his liking just in time for a Lent-oriented hyped up release.

"There are six names in that tomb. One of them is Jesus, son of Joseph. There's two Marys. There's a Matthew. There's a Judah, son of Jesus." says Jacobovici. The whole gang appeared on Larry King Live for a session of slo-pitch softball.

Real archaeologists are, of course, highly skeptical. And if you think about it, you should be too, whether or not you believe in the gospel according to Dan Brown. And if you are like me, and most of your background on Mary Magdalene comes from the Da Vinci Code, you know that while based in truth, Brown's book is still a work of fiction, and is probably based on the same semi-logical probabilities on which Cameron is basing The Lost Tomb.

For one thing, Jesus, Mary and Joseph weren't exactly (still aren't) unpopular names. I'm searching for a "that's the same as." This is why they need analogies on the SAT.

Ok, that's the same as when I was in high school. There was a guy, David Siegel, two grades ahead of me, and on the first day of class, every year, some idiot teacher who had David Siegel would come to my name on the attendance sheet and say: "Oh, David Spiegel, are you related to David Siegel?"

"Oh, look, there's a family, and it's Mary and Joseph and Mariamene and Judas son of Jesus, it MUST be the same as THE Jesus! And it PROVES that Jesus had a son!"

As Jon Stewart said: the grandson of God? Talk about the most spoiled kid ever.

This is from The Lost Tomb of Jesus:
"According to statistics, if we were on a crowded street in ancient Jerusalem and called out the name Jesus, there would be approximately a 4 percent chance that a Jesus would be there. If we were to call out the name Mary, we would have a 25 percent chance of finding a Mary. Not bad odds. But what Feuerverger explains is that if we were to call out for Jesus, Mary, Joseph, Matthew and Yosef all at the same time, the chances of all those individuals being on the same street together are quite low."

There are clearly logic holes you can drive a truck through. I mean if you were in a Waffle House on a Sunday morning in South Carolina and called out the names Jim-Bob, Betty Sue and Ellie May, the chances of them all being there and being related are pretty low, too. But then again, maybe they're not.

But this is a TV special we're talking about, so the claim is more important than the evidence, and no silly logic hole will stop the quest for TV ratings. Nor will it stop Christian leaders from taking up arms against James Cameron, the Discovery Channel, and all of Hollywood.

"...every single Lenten season there's somebody, some author or someone of these TV magazine shows which puts out some doubts about the resurrection or Jesus' divinity," said William Donohue, the President of The Catholic League. And he's right. Lent is like the sweeps week of Jesus programming, most of which claims new evidence that either supports or refutes the Jesus' resurrection or his crucifixion or... his skin color. And it's irritating really, to think that someone like James Cameron has the chutzpah to think he can reverse 2,000 years of faith in a one-hour special.

It's more irritating to think James Cameron is forcing me to agree with someone like William Donohue. This is the same guy who said in 2004 that "Hollywood is controlled by secular Jews who hate Christianity in general and Catholicism in particular...I like families, I like children, they like abortions..." which is really just one step above saying Jews drink the blood of Christian babies. And let's not get into why and how the hell this guy still has his job and gets away with saying things like that. Replace secular Jews with "brown people" or "gays" and we probably have a new president of the Catholic league. And if a rabbi said the same thing?

But I digress. The sad fact that Donohue and his church of bigotry and inaccuracy have a valid point is cause for alarm, because the guy shouldn't have a job. The thing is that belief in Jesus, from my humble outside perspective, and belief in the resurrection, requires an act of faith. And that act of faith states that Jesus' bones ascended to Heaven and so there is no tomb. And if you truly believe that, a one-hour special isn't going to change your mind. So don't watch it.

And if you don't believe that Jesus was resurrected and ascended to Heaven, that's fine, but you're never going to be able to convince someone who believes it happened that it didn't. Not even if you're armed with James Cameron's inscrutable proof. So don't watch these specials.

And if you don't watch these specials, James Cameron and "Hollywood" will stop making them. And then I won't have to agree with William Donohue the open anti-Semite gay-bashing schmuck. Because it's only a matter of time before they blame the Jews.

Thursday, March 1, 2007

Hooray for Multitasking!

And now, David watches the late innings of a meaningless baseball game while keeping an eye on the Stock Market and other work-related responsibilities. And writes his blog.

Gotta love Spring Training baseball. Sixth inning, score's tied and the Mets bring in #73 Eddie Camacho to pitch.

And as I was typing that he gave up a Home Run to the Cardinal's #68 Somebody Gonzalez, so it's 3-2. Nice job Eddie Camacho.

The Dow is in positive territory after being down almost 200 points earlier in the day after a drop of over 400 on Tuesday. So that's good news, I guess.

I know he's like the best player ever (Sandy) but dammit I hate Albert Pujols.

Why do the Mets have Ruben Sierra?

Pujols flies out to one of 2 Jews on the Mets this year - Shawn Green.

Dow back in the negative. Nice play David Wright. We go to the bottom of the Sixth.

Side note: because the Dow dropped 400 points, that's the only real business story today, so the business updates are basically ad-libbed by our reporter at the NYSE, which leaves me with little to do except stand by and keep an eye on things in case something needs to be done. And I'll have to get up and go prompt for Headline News in a half hour or so. But you don't really know what time it is.

I brought cookies to work today. Isn't that nice of me? #65 Mike Parisi (who?) in to pitch for St Louis.

HOME RUN JOSE REYES! 3-3. When he hits one, it's still exciting, Spring Training or not. And he still goes back to the dugout and does his special handshakes. Jose has a different handshake for every teammate. All different sequences of flaps and pounds and high fives and hugs and dance moves and stuff. It takes an incredible amount of concentration on his part to remember them all. Especially when you consider that most of his teammates can't remember their one sequence.

2 on, one out. Mets trying to get a little rally going against what's-his-name.

Never mind. Double Play.

Ok, I have work to do. For real.

So many big numbers on the field! Ahh! 61 for the Cardinals dealing to 63 for the Mets. Names aren't worth it. None of 'em will make the team anyway. Bottom of the 7th.

Again - why do the Mets have Ruben Sierra? He's probably younger than Julio Franco but he looks big and clumsy and old. And the Mets don't need him.

Endy Chavez hits a fly to left that gets misplayed by number 63 of the Cardinals (guess who's going back to the minors?) and the Mets get the go-ahead run on in the 7th for the polysurnamed and always dangerous (well, maybe in the winter leagues) Anderson Hernandez.

I take it back! Hernandez comes through with a single to left and the Mets take the lead! And it doesn't matter at all! Except maybe it's a sign of things to come and they won't lose to the Cardinals all year and they'll get their revenge and win the World Series--

Ok, I'm getting ahead of myself, it's only March 1st after all. Right, March 1st. Happy birthday Nicole.

Yeah, maybe I made up a word back there. Whatever.

Back to work. Everything ready for prompting at 3:20, checking on the video for 4:05, watching meaningless baseball, talking to people, writing in my blog. And Anderson Hernandez gets picked off and the inning is over.

#89 into Left Field for the Mets and making an immediate impact with two catches.

Um, and now, somebody put Sugar and Spice into a DVD player somewhere in this building and the Met game is gone. Who is watching Sugar and Spice at 3 o'clock in the afternoon? And how did they randomly decide to occupy channel 52? I am baffled. What a random movie for it to be. That's like the #89 of movies to be watching in the middle of the day while at work.

I have, by the way, changed the channel. Maybe whoever is watching that will only need to get a clip and I'll get the ninth inning.

Dammit! I'm committed now, I need to know how it ends. Luckily I'll have work to do in 5 minutes. Then I'll come back and check the final.

Yes! And we're back! No more Sugar and Spice. And so many more 70s and 80s are in the game. And it's Ruben Gotay for the Mets (#6) with a lead-off single off #78. And #89 comes up for the Mets with a chance to get some insurance for, um, some other high-numbered pitcher who stands to win the game.

I wonder how many people would have to get hurt before #70 actually started a game at first base for the Cardinals?

Dow is down again, but only a little bit. Nothing dramatic.

Ok, really, time to go prompt and be productive and all.

And I'm back and it's the top of the 9th, runner on third, two out and who's on the mound?

It's Ambiorix Burgos!!

And he strikes finish off the Cardinals and bring the Mets one game closer to Opening Day! Put it in the books!

And the Dow's down 50 again. So much for that.

Hooray Ambiorix Burgos. Hooray Multitasking. Hooray Mets.

Final Score: Mets 4, Cardinals 3. (Couldn't have done that in October?)