Wednesday, January 2, 2008

Parallel (o-Gram)

In Hebrew class today, we read a dialogue called Sh'cheinot (Neighbor). Here's a rough translation:

Rivka: Noa, I'm going to the supermarket right now. Maybe you need something?

: Yes, I'm having guests today, and I want to make chocolate cake. I only have oil and milk in the house, and I don't have time to go to the supermarket. I need eggs, a kilo of sugar, and milk chocolate.

Rivka: You need anything else?

Noa: Ah...yes. I also need a kilo of flour. And...that's it. That's all.

Rivka: Margarine you don't need?

Noa: No, for this cake I don't need margarine. Thanks.

Rivka: It's nothing. I'll be back in a little while. See ya later!

On the walk home from class, I devised a plan for the rest of my night. It went something like this:

  1. Pee

  2. Make lunch

  3. Pass out.
But when I got to step two, my plan hit a small snag. I make the same thing for lunch every day. Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwich, pretzels, fruit. Done. Yep, I'm my own soccer mom. But then, I opened the refrigerator to find:

I didn't have any bread. Or jelly. Or peanut butter. I didn't have any peanut butter in the cabinet either, which is where I normally keep peanut butter, cause who keeps peanut butter in the fridge? I guess if it's that natural stuff you have to refrigerate it whatever, point is I didn't have it.

I was reminded of Noa, the poor needy neighbor who woke up one morning and said "i'm gonna make a chocolate cake today" and somehow thought she could do it without chocolate, flour, sugar, or eggs.

Below the dialogue, there were 4 true/false questions. Here is a rough translation:

  1. Noa is a selfish person.
  2. Noa has a good heart.
  3. Rivka is a selfish person.
  4. Rivka has a good heart.
And the answers, according to the book: T, F, F, T

So what's the moral of the story? I'm selfish, I need to go grocery shopping, I had too much champagne on new year's eve, I have to buy lunch tomorrow, and I'm a bad person.

v'ani tzarich lalechet lishon.

1 comment:

NJ said...

Thoroughly enjoyed this one! Hahhaha!